What is a Mother??

So after writing a huge blog about What is a Mother?? I have decided that I will change it all and write about the different mothers I have in my life and what their wonderful examples have meant to me as I have become a mom......I previously wrote: I have asked myself to the following question so many times over the years.....What is a mom? Does a person half to have a child to be considered a mom? I really don't think so. My definition of a MOM is huge and with so many words to choose from to describe what a mom is, but to me, caring deeply for another person without limits means that they are a mom.

This is my Mom and Dad a couple of weeks after she had me......
According to her, I was a difficult labor and delivery. 36 hours in labor and 2 weeks late...What can I say? I am so worth the wait in my opinion and
being born on the day of love what could be more perfect than me?? Nothing....ok that was my gloating session, but really, my mom and I have had a really awesome relationship. Of course, we have fought over the years, laughed and cried, but she has really shown me what it takes to be a mom and I will never forget what an wonderful person she is.

When I became a mom, my mom stood by me and helped me make one of the most difficult decision that I had to make in my life. When I became a mom, it really was not the ideal situation and I had a lot of hard choices to make. I was 22, single, unmarried, and a college student. I was into a lot of things that I shouldn't have been into, but that day that I took the stupid pee test....I knew that my life wasn't about me any more and that I really needed to grow up and start thinking about someone else. I knew right off the bat that I would not be aborting this baby and that was a no brainer decision for me, but could I actually raise a child and make the best life for him or her? I was not sure about that.....I was old enough, but stable enough? That was the hardest question.....with the months ahead of me to make a decision, I had my mom's help and guidance to help me along my path way of becoming a mom.

On August 2, 2000, I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl. I named her Victoria Pearl Merritt. To me she was the most perfect thing on the face of the planet and I was so happy to have her, to be her mom. Yep at that this point in my life when I was lying on the operating table looking at this little girl thinking to myself "she doesn't look like a watermelon".....that is a real person that I made and now had to look after just for a couple more days. After I gave birth to her, I was able to make a phone call to the second most wonderful person in the world.....my daughter's soon to be new mom....

That is right...I had decided to place my daughter for adoption. What the most difficult and challenging decision......I had made a huge list of things that I wanted my daughter's mom to have (well, parents) and after looking and searching through thousands of applications I had finally chosen the perfect little family.

This is Monica...she is Carly's mom now....This woman is such an amazing person and one day I will be able to tell her thanks for everything that she had done for not only me, but also for the amazing things she has taught, given and blessed my daughter with. It is women like her that have really taught me what it takes to be a mom. For her to love a child so totally unconditionally and to take things with no resentment at all is truly amazing. I remember talking to her the day of the "face to face" meeting before Carly was born. I told her that if she is anything like me, I am so sorry and that she will have a difficult road ahead of her. She laughed and said she will be ok with it. Monica has been the mom that I hoped that one day I could learn more about and become more like her.

She has not only my child but two others that she has made her own. Christian, Carly, and Logan. She is what I consider a true one of a kind mom. She has accepted children into her life and made them hers, to love, care, and accept them for who they are and how they had been brought into her life.

To me there is no better person than Monica to raise my daughter, and I thank God for that family every day and night. One day I know I will be able to see them and be with them again. I pray for that day.

Another person that I have in my life that has shown me what it takes to be an amazing mom is my wonderful boss, Tammy. She has shown me so many things over the years and one of the was how to juggle a full time career and being a mom. She is one awesome lady that cares deeply for all her children. She has two that are hers and two that are her new husband. She has really taught me how to treat all children equally and how a mother really never stops worrying about the well-being of her children. I am really excited about her new adventure with being a new grandma. It is going to be so much fun to watch her spoiling and playing with her Grandkids. Tammy has also taught be the importance of family and how important it is to spend lots of time with love ones and how it is not always about working which makes you happy, but about being with the ones that you love and love spending time with. Taking the odd day here and there to go and spend time with parents, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews are the real joys in life.

Another mom in my life is my new mother-in-law. She is also amazing. She has taught me not only to trust in my skills as a mother, she has shown me how to make sure that I keep my marriage alive and to show love to each other. Dave and I have only been together for a short time, but having this mother in my life has been such a God send to me. We have been through a lot and she keeps helping me through the stuff that we need to get through with grace and courage. She is indeed an amazing person, a great friend, mother-in-law, and of course grandma. I am truly blessed to have her in my life.

My sister.....I can not get away with listing all these wonderful women without giving thanks and gratitude to my wonderful, beloved sister. Without her help and guidance, I would so fall apart. She is amazing....I am now wondering if there is another word for that, but I don't know if it would give the same affect....anyways, with five kids under her belt, one dog, one husband and the occasional puppies, she seems to have the answers for everything.....especially what is for dinner. She is my life line and I call her often for everything from "what's for dinner" to "are boys really like this" to "just how is it going." Thanks, Kathy for everything and I think that you are the most amazing mom!!! Your example is wonderful and I hope that I can be like you one day.

Ok.....now I think that I have written enough.....words could never convey all the love that I have in my heart to all of the women that have been in my life. Thanks can never be enough either, but I do thank you and hope that all of you can put up with my needs and freakiness. Thanks and I hope that everyone has a wonderful MOTHER'S DAY because there is nothing better in the world than to have someone come up to you and say "I LOVE YOU MOM!!!"


My little son is so sweet and cute. I love every moment with him and couldn't ask for a better son in the world. Thanks Harley for choosing me to be your second mom. I love you with all my heart and then some.....